The whole situation got me thinking and I came up with a few things, that you should do the next time you wait for a table. By the way I really hope there won't be a next time, and they'll fire you!
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Be a good actor.
Are you fed up, with all the annoying customers, who talk rudely, never seem to appreciate what you do and always find something to complain about? Well tough luck, pal! You need to suck it up, and pretend, that you are grateful for their arrogance, because you know, “the customer is always right”. What I'm trying to say is, that you need to make the customers believe, that you love what you do, even if you don't, and that this is the perfect place for them to eat. Be polite, friendly and don't forget to smile.
Dress and look appropriately.
No one will tip a hobo, they probably won't even order from one, so try to look nice and clean. Keep in mind that you're not at a rock festival, so change your outfit regularly and wash your filthy hands.
Know what's on the menu.
Customers tend to like those waiters, who know their stuff. Not like some waiters who seem, that they have no idea what day of the week it is, let alone what's on the menu. You should know every meal and drink tha's available, I mean prices, ingredients, the whole thing.
Don't mess up the order.
If you mess up the order, you can probably kiss your tip goodbye. I personally don't like to send back the food, in case they mess up my order, because I'm afraid I might get something “extra” in my food, out of the goodness of their hearts, but rest assured most customers will. Not only will you loose your tip, but the price of the food might even come down from your salary.
Be as quick as possible.
When people are hungry they don't like to wait and they can't seem to understand, that preparing food takes time. So when the chef says, the food's ready, you best make haste and serve it as soon as possible.
Visit the tables often.
Checking back from time to time, might earn you some points with the customers, giving them the illusion that you care. Also they might order something new.
So these are the most important things you, waiters should keep in mind, if you are hungry for some tips.
If you do get fired I won't lose any sleep over it. But since I'm such a nice and helpful guy, I even looked for a site that has job listings on it, for waiters. Make sure to check it out Cylex Jobs.
I hope you'll learn from all of this, you and the rest of the lousy waiters out there! I'm out!